Thoughtlessness is a silent enemy to a loving relationship and it held true for my marriage. I resented my husband for being thoughtless and instead of building a bridge of love, I created a wall. I expected him to reach out when we should be meeting in the middle. I presumed he'd know my needs even those that I did not speak of, expected him to understand ideas and decisions I made without his approval, I longed for his appreciation when I can't even give the same. When was the last time I had purposely thought of him, his needs and his desires more important than mine? When was the last time I engaged my thoughts first before my mouth? Here I was thinking my husband was the only thoughtless one, when in fact it took two to tango. If this was to continue, my marriage was highly likely to fall apart. If I didn't want embers, I had to relight the fire.
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Lord, I know my idea of being thoughtful can sometimes be that of a pompous person. As much as I am very attentive and personal in giving the wants and needs of my spouse--both tangible and intangible-- I can also be very callous with my attitude in giving such, wanting and expecting that he exerts the same effort in giving. When he fails to deliver exactly how and what I want, I get disappointed and most times disillusioned about the man I married. I resent him for not knowing me, for being insensitive to my wants and needs, for being uncaring and impassive. Teach me the designs of a virtuous wife, that I may accept and not resent him for who and what he is and not expect him to be the man I desire him to be, that I may engage my mind first in any situation in our marriage rather than my lips, and that I may understand that when he does not speak my language it doesn't mean there is less love for me. Guide me back to that time when thoughtfulness came naturally without expectations, to love him just because. Amen.
How precious also are Your thoughts to me...How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. -- Psalm 139:17-18
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Lord, I know my idea of being thoughtful can sometimes be that of a pompous person. As much as I am very attentive and personal in giving the wants and needs of my spouse--both tangible and intangible-- I can also be very callous with my attitude in giving such, wanting and expecting that he exerts the same effort in giving. When he fails to deliver exactly how and what I want, I get disappointed and most times disillusioned about the man I married. I resent him for not knowing me, for being insensitive to my wants and needs, for being uncaring and impassive. Teach me the designs of a virtuous wife, that I may accept and not resent him for who and what he is and not expect him to be the man I desire him to be, that I may engage my mind first in any situation in our marriage rather than my lips, and that I may understand that when he does not speak my language it doesn't mean there is less love for me. Guide me back to that time when thoughtfulness came naturally without expectations, to love him just because. Amen.
How precious also are Your thoughts to me...How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. -- Psalm 139:17-18