Forgiveness has to happen for a marriage to work. It is not a one time big time thing but a moment by moment choice--to forgive the flaws, mistakes and inadequacies of each other. Small and big, minor and major. Whether your spouse feels sorry, shows remorse or seeks forgiveness, we are called to forgive. Not once but many times as Jesus commanded. I know you think that it is so much easier said than done. I am not saying forgiving or seeking forgiveness is easy as they most certainly are not. But once you acknowledge that you are a sinner too, whose sins were paid for on the cross by Jesus--you will realize that all the hurt that you sustained are nothing quite like the pain suffered by Christ. Yet He paid for your sins and mine--in full. With His life. Whether we feel remorse, whether we acknowledge such sinfulness and humble ourselves for forgiveness--He wasn't selective. He died for ALL. Once you get to this point of humility, admission and acceptance, only then will you be able to forgive others. I sustained hurt from those I loved and cared for. I was betrayed by those I trusted. And I hurt those I loved even greater, betrayed those who trusted me, too. But as a recipient of God's grace, mercy and forgiveness, I am able to forgive my spouse and those who caused me hurt. And because my husband came to the admission of his own sins and accepted Christ in his life, he was able to forgive me for the what seemed like an unforgivable hurt I caused him. That is why we are still here, together, better than ever. We made it past a major trial, past the stumbling block the enemy snared us with. And we know that there will be more traps, more tests, more hurt in the future--but we will chose to forgive. Not with our might and our own will because we most certainly can't and won't. It will only be with and through God's grace will we be able to do so.
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Lord, forgiveness is something difficult for a very proud person like me. It took me a long time to be able to forgive those who have hurt me and caused my heart pain. But You had a way of teaching me this, a lesson I had to learn the hard way because of my arrogance. You taught me that loving meant forgiveness, that unconditional love forgives and keeps no record of wrong. And You showed me how immeasurable Your love for me was by forgiving the sins even I cannot forgive myself for. All the selfish years, I justified my own wrong further by saying the universe owed me. While I knew the path lead nowhere, still I took it, risking everything I held dear. After all, I said, I was just human. I could not forgive others, yet I continued doing things that even I myself would find hard to forgive when done to me. I wasn't playing fair. Then I fell flat on my face and became angry at people who hurt me , even angrier at myself for my willfulness. Still, I was too conceited to admit my mistake and seek You. I blamed everyone but myself. Then You spoke to me that one Sunday afternoon and told me to surrender the pain of unforgiveness of those who caused me hurt and of the burden of my guilt. You knew I couldn't take it anymore. You called me and I wondered why You'd speak to a sinner like me. You told me You loved me. Unconditionally. If You a God could forgive an impossible sinner such as I, who was I not to forgive those who have wronged me? I surrendered my broken heart, wove the white flag. I was done being proud. As You promised in Psalm 147:3, You healed my broken heart and bound my wound. That very same day, You freed me from the jail of my own-making. You handed the key that released all inmates in the dark chambers of my heart including myself, lifting every weight off my shoulder. Thank You, Father for this freedom, for the redemption, for the clean slate, for Your forgiveness. Because You did it first and taught me a lesson, I am able to forgive. Indeed, accepting Jesus as my Saviour is the best decision of my life. Amen.
What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did for your sakes in the presence of Christ. -- 2 Corinthians 2:10
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Lord, forgiveness is something difficult for a very proud person like me. It took me a long time to be able to forgive those who have hurt me and caused my heart pain. But You had a way of teaching me this, a lesson I had to learn the hard way because of my arrogance. You taught me that loving meant forgiveness, that unconditional love forgives and keeps no record of wrong. And You showed me how immeasurable Your love for me was by forgiving the sins even I cannot forgive myself for. All the selfish years, I justified my own wrong further by saying the universe owed me. While I knew the path lead nowhere, still I took it, risking everything I held dear. After all, I said, I was just human. I could not forgive others, yet I continued doing things that even I myself would find hard to forgive when done to me. I wasn't playing fair. Then I fell flat on my face and became angry at people who hurt me , even angrier at myself for my willfulness. Still, I was too conceited to admit my mistake and seek You. I blamed everyone but myself. Then You spoke to me that one Sunday afternoon and told me to surrender the pain of unforgiveness of those who caused me hurt and of the burden of my guilt. You knew I couldn't take it anymore. You called me and I wondered why You'd speak to a sinner like me. You told me You loved me. Unconditionally. If You a God could forgive an impossible sinner such as I, who was I not to forgive those who have wronged me? I surrendered my broken heart, wove the white flag. I was done being proud. As You promised in Psalm 147:3, You healed my broken heart and bound my wound. That very same day, You freed me from the jail of my own-making. You handed the key that released all inmates in the dark chambers of my heart including myself, lifting every weight off my shoulder. Thank You, Father for this freedom, for the redemption, for the clean slate, for Your forgiveness. Because You did it first and taught me a lesson, I am able to forgive. Indeed, accepting Jesus as my Saviour is the best decision of my life. Amen.
What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did for your sakes in the presence of Christ. -- 2 Corinthians 2:10