Forgiveness is hard. In all our humanity, how can we when in our very nature, we are self-centered beings? Forgiving someone means we cancel their debt, absorb the cost of their offense. Who does that? Definitely not someone whose heart is enveloped in bitterness but someone who has received the same forgiveness from his Creator, the same grace from Jesus. The failure to forgive reveals an unforgiving heart and an unforgiven heart.
I admit that even after the forgiveness I received from the Lord, I still found it quite difficult to forgive others who offended me. And I felt guilty and disappointed in myself. I knew I must examine my heart before the Lord and felt the urgency to be accountable not just to anyone but to someone neutral but godly, a sister-in-Christ whose heart was for the Lord. All through ordeal of sorting my feelings and talking to her, I realized that forgiveness is not just a one-time-big-time thing. It is not just an event but also a process--because the hurt, lack of trust and anger could not be immediately eradicated, I knew I had to remain vigilant whether I was sinning in my heart all over again. I guess that's why Jesus said to forgive seventy-seven times. Forgiveness is not the end of the matter, it must continue because time and again, you will be reminded of the offense, and you will hurt again. This hurt and struggle must be brought to God for his cleansing and strength.
I admit that even after the forgiveness I received from the Lord, I still found it quite difficult to forgive others who offended me. And I felt guilty and disappointed in myself. I knew I must examine my heart before the Lord and felt the urgency to be accountable not just to anyone but to someone neutral but godly, a sister-in-Christ whose heart was for the Lord. All through ordeal of sorting my feelings and talking to her, I realized that forgiveness is not just a one-time-big-time thing. It is not just an event but also a process--because the hurt, lack of trust and anger could not be immediately eradicated, I knew I had to remain vigilant whether I was sinning in my heart all over again. I guess that's why Jesus said to forgive seventy-seven times. Forgiveness is not the end of the matter, it must continue because time and again, you will be reminded of the offense, and you will hurt again. This hurt and struggle must be brought to God for his cleansing and strength.